Deb Sofield

Leadership

Just Apologize

I don’t know what it is about having to say you’re sorry, but it is, perhaps, one of the hardest things many of us have to do or should do if we’ve crossed the line or intentionally (or not) caused harm to someone else. Now, no worries about me…I haven’t done anything that I need to do a shout out apology for (yes, I’m joking), and certainly not here on the radio… but, lately, as I have been listening to some of my friends talk about their hurt feelings, it occurred to me that we would all do better if […]

Start and Finish

Recently a client called me about entering a competition – she was not sure she wanted to go through the hard work, early mornings and late nights and stress, pain, and hassle of it all, so she called to asked me what I thought. Realizing that she would have a lot of work to do to win the race – I was tempted to let her off the hook this time – to focus on her work – to build her career – to push her to the top but then I realized looking back over our last year together how far […]

Don’t Complain About Things You Are Not Willing to Change

I have just about reached my limit with people who complain about things they are not willing to change. You hear it all the time from some in your group. They are the ones who whisper loudly that someone else didn’t do their job or someone else didn’t tell them some tiny bit of useless information or someone else said something to someone. And you know the rest of the excuses of the one person who blames their lack of accomplishments on everyone else but themselves. Today, I have a lot to say to those people. What are we supposed […]

Deep roots are not reached by the frost

J.R.R. Tolkien, in his book “The Fellowship of the Ring” writes, All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king. We are all familiar with the opening lines of this poem: All that is gold does not glitter/Not all those who wander are lost…and while I like those lines, I am […]

Learn to handle things on your own

People aren’t always going to be there for you. That’s why you learn to handle things on your own. You know what I think one of the hardest things in life is? It’s when you have to do things on your own. I do tend to work alone—it’s just the nature of my business—but sometimes I like to work with others; I just like to hear what they think, or I like to see the process of working together to accomplish a goal come to realization. I also like the comradely that happens when you put good people together to […]

Don’t Be a Clapper

Recently in an interview session, I asked my client what was the best advice she’d ever received and she replied, “Don’t be a clapper.” What,” I said, “what does that mean”? She said that all her life her parents had told her never to stand on the sideline of life but to jump into whatever opportunity came her way so she wouldn’t be one of the crowd, the audience or those in the stands, enjoying the action but never participating in the thrilling excitement of the game, the sweat and tears of the action. She said that those sideline people […]

The only person you are destined to become

The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. Ralph Waldo Emerson Decisions, decisions, decisions. They are such a big part of our everyday life, and no matter how many times you and I decide to go with the flow and let life “work out,” in the end we all make decisions that will have a lasting impact. I like today’s thought because, once again, it is a reminder that we all choose our outcome. I know that many will argue with me on that thought because they have bought into the belief that […]

Turn Yourself Around

I just finished reading a great book called “The Map Thief,” the story of Forbes Smiley, III, an esteemed rare maps dealer, who, as the book jacket says, “…spent years doubling as a map thief—until he was finally arrested slipping maps out of books in the Yale University library.” It was a great book, and I learned a lot about maps: how they were created, and how, by simply changing a border, you could change a nation, but, beyond my own education about maps and their value, was the story of the failings of a guy who committed crimes against […]

When your past calls, don’t answer

When your past calls, don’t answer; it has nothing new to say. How many times have you fallen back into an old habit or pattern because you answered the call of your past? You know you should not have picked up the proverbial phone, but you did, and you said hello and now you’re dealing with the aftermath. I’m encouraging you today to say goodbye and leave your past behind you as you move forward. I think it is interesting that so many people I talk with have this same pull–it’s like a spider web that seems to draw many […]