Deb Sofield

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Skills

Leaving a Life Imprint

Recently I was at the beach for a quick vacation, and as I was sitting on the shore soaking up the sun, I was fascinated just watching the waves come in and go out, a little closer to me each time, until I had to move my beach chair back from the water onto higher sand or be soaked in the salt water swirling around me. I couldn’t help but wonder and watch the power of the water on the shifting sands, and then how, within a few hours, all the work of little hands that built sand castles all […]

Don’t Hold on to Grudges

I have been thinking about a few clients that I work with, and have come to realize that there is one thing that seems to hold many of them back from being amazing rock star speakers. That one thing is an old hurt from someone in their past who is now irrelevant and who basically told them they were awful speakers and to keep quiet. Now I don’t know what the teacher or another adult actually said, but to a young person, what they heard was, “Don’t open your mouth again.” And here we are years later, and the idea […]

Clutter is wrecking your self-worth

I have written about the issue of clutter in our lives a few times, but I keep coming back to it because I find, over and over, that there just might be that one thing that you’re holding on to that is actually holding you back from achieving what you want in your life. When I talk about clutter, I don’t just mean that you need to clean out the attic or garage (although those are good places to start). For a bigger life impact, you might want to consider tossing out a few things that are more personal to […]

Be a weed

So by now, you know that little things in life make me wonder. Big things make me wonder too, like how many stars are in the universe and what are we going to do about the trash in our oceans and overfishing by some countries.  But sometimes my mind seeks to know how little things work, like how is it that a dandelion–you know, the little yellow flowering weed with a thick stem and hairy little leaves that I can crush with my hand and have it wither away quickly–can push its way up through asphalt, the road that my […]

Live in such a way that if anyone should speak badly of you no one would believe it

My friends send me email jokes and cartoons all the time; in fact I had a few friends I had to ask to put me on the weekly list and not the daily emails. I have no idea what they do all day that allows them to surf the web and send their network 20-30 jokes and stories all day-but good for them. A while back I get this one and I liked it…it said, Live in such a way that if anyone should speak badly of you no one would believe it. Wouldn’t that be great? What if you […]

The Emotion of Scarcity

I was on a plane this week and read an interesting book called Scarcity by Sendhil Mullainathan and Eldar Shafir. It was thought provoking from the standpoint that many people make serious life decisions based on a scarcity mindset. The book’s definition of scarcity is having less then you feel you need. Now, that definition is important on many levels, but today I want to discuss a few thoughts that really stood out to me especially when I think about how the mental emotion of scarcity can limit your vision for your life and your hopes and dreams for your […]

Set Your Life on Fire

Because of my being a speaker, I have the opportunity to travel around the world teaching public speaking, presentation and media skills to elected officials or those who would like to be. When I was speaking in the Middle East a while back, I was training some dynamic up-and-coming young women who were seeking a seat on their local council and one day at lunch I noticed that one of the ladies was reading a book of poetry by Rumi, a Persian poet and philosopher. It struck me as unusual that someone would be carrying around a book of ancient […]

The Emotion of Worry

I am continuing with my series on emotions. I started with anger because anger really hurts you and those around you. Remember, anger is a cancer to your soul. So, to have a happy life you have to let it go. Then I talked about the pain of shame. Shame is a Failure to Meet Your Own Standard of Behavior, and this emotion will play havoc in your life if you’re not careful. And I added in the thought that you that you should stop thinking that others have to accept your forgiveness for you to be forgiven. They don’t. […]

Garbage In, Garbage Out

Seriously, I have no idea why people watch TV. Consider this a rant (and forgive me if you feel otherwise): in the space of two minutes of my clicking through TV channels in my hotel room, I saw horrifying and gruesome abuse (directed towards women), physical beatings of men and women, vulgar language and inappropriate insinuation of harm to kids. And we wonder what is wrong with our world! I have never been a big TV watcher. I taught myself years ago to put down the remote down and pick up a book. While I love any TV adventure that […]