Deb Sofield

Friendship

I don’t know a single successful person

I don’t know a single successful person that leaves their shopping cart in the middle of the parking lot. I freely admit that I am probably in the 2% of people who love to go grocery shopping. I always have a list, but I also like to wander the aisles to see what else is in the market. It’s not that I have to buy anything; I’m just fascinated by packaging, current must-have mineral waters, acai berry teas and live lobsters in the tank with the little rubber bands on their finger-crushing claws. I tend to shop everywhere because of […]

The Emotion of Fear

I am continuing with my series on emotions. I started the series with the emotion of anger because anger is a cancer to your soul. So, to have any chance for a successful and happy life, friend, you have to let it go. Then I talked about the pain of personal shame. Shame is a Failure to Meet Your Own Standard of Behavior, and this emotion will wreck your life if you’re not careful. And I added in the thought that you should stop thinking that others have to accept your forgiveness for you to be forgiven. They don’t. Once […]

The Kindness of Strangers

I am sure at some time or another when you least expected it, a “stranger” helped you. The kindness of strangers–completely unexpected, gratefully accepted and long remembered. It sometimes happens when a thought flashes in your mind, I could use some help here. And suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, someone comes to your aid answering your silent prayer or your out-loud-request to any and all visiting angels to hurry and help. I can remember many times when I uttered a prayer or word or even a thought that flickered through my mind requesting help when, lo and behold, someone in […]

The Emotion of Frustration

I am continuing with my series on emotions. I started the series with the emotion of anger because anger is a cancer to your soul. So, to have any chance for a successful and happy life, friend, you have to let it go. Then I talked about the pain of personal shame. Shame is a Failure to Meet Your Own Standard of Behavior, and this emotion will wreck your life if you’re not careful. And I added in the thought that you should stop thinking that others have to accept your forgiveness for you to be forgiven. They don’t. Once […]

3 Things I Need Each Day

With the 4th of July upon us, I think it best to let you rest and have a time of reflection on the holiday. That being said, if you can spare just a little over four minutes, I’d encourage you to watch this video clip of Matthew McConaughey’s acceptance speech upon winning Best Actor at the Oscars a few years ago. His short message of 3 Things I Need Each Day has deep meaning, and it is one of the few clips that I keep on my computer because I agree with him on the idea that we each need: 1) Something […]

If You Want To Be Trusted Be Honest

Seems like a no brainer to be honest, but you and I know that some of our friends will skirt the truth for various reasons, none being worth the damage that a lie will yield. It makes perfect sense as you go through life, that if you want to be trusted, be honest. I had a friend who was notorious for telling (as she would explain) “little white lies,” as compared to green or blue lies, I guess. She wouldn’t even blink when telling a “little” mistruth, and over time I started to wonder where the “little lie” stopped and […]

The Emotion of Worry

I am continuing with my series on emotions. I started with anger because anger really hurts you and those around you. Remember, anger is a cancer to your soul. So, to have a happy life you have to let it go. Then I talked about the pain of shame. Shame is a Failure to Meet Your Own Standard of Behavior, and this emotion will play havoc in your life if you’re not careful. And I added in the thought that you that you should stop thinking that others have to accept your forgiveness for you to be forgiven. They don’t. […]

What’s in The Well, Comes Up in The Bucket

Recently, I was listening to the commencement address by Tyler Perry at Tuskegee University and, in his remarks, he made this statement: “What’s in the well, comes up in the bucket.” (http://buzz.blog.ajc.com/2016/05/09/tyler-perrys-moving-tuskegee-university-commencement-speech/) It is the first time I had heard this phrase and it just stuck with me, because it seems to be the perfect southern phrase of how life really is no matter what it seems like on the outside. I get that everyone wants to appear successful to friends and family (and enemies), and good for those who have made it because, no doubt, it took work to […]

Go Where You’re Celebrated, Not Tolerated

A while back I stepped down from a leadership position that I really enjoyed. I like to be called Boss Lady, but the reality is I do too much, so in order to take control of my world, I had to make some changes to protect the time I have to do the things that I am interested in doing and, in some cases, am required to do. It’s never easy stepping away from a project you birthed or created or really loved. But the fact is that in order to leave a legacy of success, there comes a time […]